Spangler Maria Miranda has a new gig — for one weekend only (for now). And among the many things we know about her, we know that she’s rarely without an opinion, and never afraid to share it.

So as she launches a show that gives voice to women’s issues in 2010, we asked her to tell us about her experience as theatrical producer, which you can be part of starting this Friday. (Her usual column returns in a few days.)

I refuse to call myself an artist.

I founded a performance-art collective: Whisper to a Scream.

I’m starting this confessional with contradictions. I’m sorry. I’m not an artist, but I know plenty of people who are. Yes, that is more of a coherent truth. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a lot to say about everything. However, I believe there are people out there who can say it better than me.

Too many cooks in the kitchen are a good thing. Collaboration is integral to the work I create. Approaching a subject with a singular world view is too narrow. This entire show was created with many voices, opinions, mediums and personalities. It’s like a hearty stew and I get to stir the pot. With that said …

It’s like herding cats. The downside to working with many talented people is that everybody wants a piece of them. The writers, cast and crew are entirely women (save one brave male soul). They are mothers, workers, flight attendants, artists, dancers, writers, actors, technicians, social workers, gymnasts, lawyers, wives and girlfriends. Getting one scene scheduled for rehearsal took almost two weeks!

You text some people. One person needs to be called on her home phone because her cell phone died, and two other people have no Internet connection. There are family emergencies, work demands and plain old sickness. Of course someone is on her period and being a total bitch. Wait, that would be me. Despite all of this, everyone is still committed to doing their best. Meow.

What is the word for this light thingy? I don’t know what it is, but we need one. Producing this show has required me to have answers for questions that I didn’t know existed. I make it a point to defer to experts, and yes, I expect them to know what I’m talking about when I say things like, “I want this part to have more oomph and less zaaaa.”

Experimentation still has boundaries. I can only go as far as my leash allows me. Oftentimes, I produced this show in a vacuum, failing to consider impact, all the while focusing on intent. Will this piece, as powerful as it is, trigger an audience member’s memory of sexual assault? What is the difference between shock value and being thought-provoking?

There is a lot of sex in this damn show. The marketing director at CPT was more than eager to add a mature-audiences warning to our promotional materials. That was a good idea. Do not bring your grandma to this show unless she’s Linda Lovelace. I asked women to create works that centered on the little things in life that continue to plague women. The finished product says that sex, sexual identity, sexual expression and gender roles still have control — positive or negative — over us.

Fear is motivation. I’m afraid of all sorts of things. I’m afraid my cast won’t show up on opening night. I’m afraid that a raging nor’easter will trap everyone inside their houses and no one will come to the show. I am afraid that people will just get up and walk out, or laugh during the serious parts. I am afraid that people will leave unsatisfied. I worry that it will be an utter embarrassment.

The only way to combat some of these factors is through preparation, anticipation of needs and knowing your audience. It also takes a degree of risk and high dose of resilience. Some people will hate this show. That is something I will have to live with.

The only way to learn how to fly is to get pushed out of the nest. Mother birds push their babies out of the nest, and the baby has two options: flap those wings or fall to a sudden death. Miraculously, baby birds instinctively fly, and sadly, some don’t have what it takes to make it. I’m flapping. I’ll either soar, or fall, on Friday night. See you then.

The Details

Microscopes&Megaphones

Part of the Big [Box] series at Cleveland Public Theatre (6415 Detroit Ave., Gordon Square Arts District)

Jan. 29-31, 2010

Tickets are $12-$15; purchase them or learn more by clicking here.

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